Herb Alpert is king. This is a true statement.
For some reason, today Herb Alpert is considered uncool or something by people who have no idea who he is. It may be the name. Herb is not a cool name. (This is also a true statement.)
"Herb" notwithstanding, THOSE PEOPLE ARE WRONG. Herb Alpert is one of the coolest people to ever exist. And people who know who he is, know this (look at this sentence a few times, it will then begin to make sense ;-D).
Below, I will display Herb Alpert's awesomeness. He was so cool, he elevated cheesy '60s music videos. This is now art.
A Taste of Honey
Herb running down the beach in a tux, while carrying his trumpet. This is standard HA&TJB stuff. THIS IS STINKIN' COOL.
This Guy's In Love
Oh, how I love this video. It's so completely and irredeemable cheesy (and so perfect).
The Lonely Bull
That smile at :53? That's Mr. Alpert saying, "Why yes, I am wearing a bright white suit and playing the trumpet in the middle of the bleachers in an empty bullfighting stadium. OF COURSE I'M COOLER THAN YOU."
The Spanish Flea
There's a creepy stuffed animal just sitting in a chair. Herb's completely miming his playing. There's random girls dancing...as random girls always dance in the '60s. And Herb is finally like "what the heck?!" and just starts clapping.
Okay, this video doesn't actually have Herb Alpert or the Tijuana Brass in it visually. Only their music.
But, this IS an example of what always happens when anyone listens to Mr. Alpert: They grab their nearest ugly, upholstery poncho (that Micky Dolenz would be so proud of)....AND RUN AROUND DANCING VERY ODDLY.
Herb Alpert in strangely casual wear (where's his beach tux?!) hanging out on top of a dune buggy thing. Many surf boards stand nearby ominously. SUDDENLY, the entire cast of a Beach Party rip-off come running out. They dance creepily before running around like there's a bomb threat. Herb continues to stand on said dune buggy thing pretending that none of those people exist. He also sings for a short while -- because it was casual day.
Mame with Louis Armstrong
THIS IS JUST LEGENDARY. OH MY GOSH.
Herb Alpert and Louis Armstrong together (and neither playing the trumpet). Herb is clearly in awe of Mr. Armstrong and awkwardly trying not to sing louder, or faster, or more than Mr. Armstrong. AND THAT HAND SLIDE THING AT THE END. Oh my gosh. (And apparently, on this same show, they sang Mack The Knife together. I NEED TO SEE THAT.)
Anyway, here was just a short list of Herb Alpert awesomeness. If you find yourself addicted, don't worry. *I* won't laugh at you. I am always addicted.
It's one thing to listen to Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass, but it's quite another thing to WATCH THEM. Listening is chill and awesome. WATCHING IS WOWZIE KAZAM AND AWESOME.
Just remember that.