Six Greatest Upbeat, Cheerful Bobby Darin Songs About Violent Death

Oh, Bobby.

Bobby Darin liked fast songs. If songs weren't fast -- he enjoyed speeding them up (compare Bobby's "On The Street Where You Live" to the film version sometime: HILARIOUS). This is not to say he didn't brilliantly sing many slow songs, because he did. It's just he was so utterly Bobby with his fast-paced, snapping songs.

He also, THOROUGHLY, enjoyed songs about people dying. According to Bobby, clearly songs about violent death must always be sung cheerfully. And he's so darn cheerful, most of time you don't realize that you're tapping your foot to the detailed description of someone being done in by a serial killer.

So...

6) "Clementine"

In Bobby's interpretation of "Oh My Darling Clementine," the title female weighs 299 pounds and a bridge breaks while she's walking on it -- plunging her into the river below. She immediately sinks and drowns, with the narrator watching. He explains himself by saying:

I thought that she was doin' fine
I wasn't nervous
Not until the service
That they held
For Clementine.

Poor Clem...

5) "Artificial Flowers"

This song contains genuinely gripping social commentary. Any self-respecting crooner would sing slowly, letting each phrase and word sink in -- perfectly guilting the listener. Not Bobby. He just states the facts: nine year-old Annie is an orphan who survives by making artificial flowers for rich ladies to wear. She is found one day frozen to death. That's that. As Bobby happily dances by, he does stop to declare:

There must be a heaven where little Annie can play
In heavenly gardens and bowers.
And instead of a halo she'll wear 'round her head
A garland of genuine flowers.

That's cool at least. CONSOLATION PRIZE, ANNIE! Yay! ;-D

4) "That's How It Went, All Right"

This is quite the dramatic stuff. Jealous guy kills girlfriend. The girl can't get away from the knife and the guy can't stop himself. Afterward, he sets her down and watches her white dress turn red with blood. Bobby fully acts out the scene and dances along cheerfully! Might I also mention that this scene was Bobby's film-debut.

I love Bobby. He was crazy.

3) "Goodbye Charlie"

Bobby doesn't even pretend to care that someone's been shot and killed in this song. AND IT'S HIS BEST FRIEND. He mumbles some false sentiment about missing Charlie and feeling low, just before gleefully singing:

Goodbye... Charlie
Cashin' in your chips

Note to everyone: Bobby would be awesome to have as friend. He's always there to cheer you up and you CAN LITERALLY NEVER DEPRESS HIM. Be aware though, that he will care very little when you die; even less if you haven't left him some sort of financial aid.


The song wasn't on YouTube, but you can listen to it here.

2) "Mack the Knife"

MacHeath, babe, is quite the incomparable killer. He never takes away a trace of blood and knows the exact amount of cement to weigh a body down. People are disappearing left and right....which means.... LOOK OUT! OLD MACKY'S BACK IN TOWN! The main death highlighted in this song is that of Louie Miller. Poor fool.



1) "Gyp the Cat"

I consider this to be Bobby's sequel to "Mack the Knife" and really, the lesser song. HOWEVER, I like Gyp the character better than Mack the character. Mack seems to be quite proficient at his job of killing, but Gyp seems to just enjoy it. And Gyp doesn't stop at murder. He dabbles in extortion, bank robbery, burglary, pick-pocketing -- everything is cool with him. He even pretends to have a funeral for himself and shows up at that very funeral as his "twin brother" and proceeds to pick the pockets of the mourners at his funeral. THERE'S A GUY who cheerfully enjoys his work as much as Bobby cheerfully enjoys singing about it.

Oh, and those BRILLIANT opening lines:

Where those bayou's wind
And them gators swim
Sometime late last night
When the moon was dim
Someone left this life
Much against his will
And while Gyp the Cat was alibi-in'
You know his clothes were dryin'

Listen to it here.

And there you have the definitive six upbeat and cheerful Bobby Darin songs about violent deaths. What are your favorites (mentioned or not)?

-Millie

2011 in Film: May

You know what they say: "Better almost never, than actually never."

And with that GLORIOUS opening sentence, I am going to move right into the month in review.

May was a pretty cool month. I had a rather late start (I had only watched three films before the 19th), but eventually ended with a not really respectable 15 (June WILL be better. ;-D). And I can't really blame Doctor Who this time, because I have watched very little (I'M AVOIDING THE END OF TEN BECAUSE I WILL THEN HAVE NOTHING TO LIVE FOR).

May:  7 new films/16 total

My Favorite New Film:

Attack of the 50 Foot Woman. This movie is perfection and genius and, oddly enough, also Millieness personified. Can I just take this moment to recommend it to everyone -- everywhere.

My Least Favorite New Film:

This was a pretty awesome month with no 1 or 2 starred reviews, so I'm gonna have to go with the three starred Endless Night. Hayley was utterly perfect and Agatha Christie GETS ME EVERY BLOODY TIME, but I cannot handle watching Hywel Bennett. As I mentioned on the 2011 in Film page (where you will always find a short one or two sentence review for every new-to-me film), his late '90s power-mom hairstyle was really creeping me out. ;-D 


Unfortunately, this photo doesn't give it NEARLY full justice:

Best Movie Title:

Attack of the 50 Foot Woman. There was no contest.


Best Cast:

Love is a Ball: Charles Boyer, Glenn Ford, Hope Lange, Ricard Montalban...(any film with Charles Boyer will always win Best Cast).


Worst Cast: 

Hmmm, there wasn't really a bad cast. But, I will take this moment to once again condemn Hywel Bennett and his haircut. ;-D

Best Title Song:

Goodbye Charlie. It's such a lovely, cheerful song about the main character's violent death.

Runner up: Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (which I may or may not have gone to the midnight premiere of, because I'm a dork). THE PIRATE'S MUSIC ALWAYS WINS.

Most Horribly, Depressing Ending:

Edward Scissorhands. WHY?! WHY?! WHY?! I mean, I understand why. BUT WHHHHYYYY?! Was this just so I would cry thousands of tears? ;-D

Most Viewed Actors:
Bob Hope: 3
Vincent Price: 2
Michael Callan 2
Johnny Depp: 2


Films by Decades:
1900s: 1 / 0 new
1930s: 2 / 0 new
1940s: 2 / 0 new
1950s: 2 / 2 new
1960s: 6 / 2 new
1970s: 1 / 1 new
1990s: 1 / 1 new
2010s: 1 / 1 new


Well, I'll see you in July! Hopefully, with more films than this pitiful amount! ;-D

Winner of the Bob Hope DVD Giveaway!

I am SO sorry that it took me a week to post this -- the delay is inexcusable! (But, you can blame finals! ;-D)

I would like to thank everyone who participated. It was awesome to read all the Bob Hope fandom.

Anyway, to choose the winner I used Random.org. This ensured that everything was completely fair and Wowzie Kazam!

The winning number was 2, which means Audrey will be receiving the copy of Princess and the Pirate! Just email me your mailing info at classicforeverblogger@yahoo.com and I'll be mailing that out soon! :-D

Thanks again to everyone who entered. Hopefully, I'll be able to have another contest soon!

-Millie

June 6, 1944

Soldiers, Sailors and Airmen of the Allied Expeditionary Force! You are about to embark upon a great crusade, toward which we have striven these many months. The eyes of the world are upon you. The hopes and prayers of liberty loving people everywhere march with you. In company with our brave Allies and brothers in arms on other fronts, you will bring about the destruction of the German war machine, the elimination of Nazi tyranny over the oppressed peoples of Europe, and security for ourselves in a free world. ...

The tide has turned! The free men of the world are marching together to victory!

-General Eisenhower

We will never forget.

-Millie

{Photo credits: Robert Capa}

Lovely Lady of the Week: Francoise Hardy

I know, I KNOW, I haven't posted in the series for quite some time. But I was posting Francoise's "La Mer" on Tumblr just now (it's one of my absolute favorite summer songs), and I suddenly decided to resurrect the Lovely Lady series.

It was quite difficult to narrow down the photos from the ones I had saved to Oscar (my laptop. He's actually named after a awesome/famous Oscar!), because Francoise Hardy is a stinkin' style goddess and never looks not-awesome (she's still gorgeous today). Here are a "few" of my favorite photos:

 ^Only Francoise gets away with wearing that. Everyone else would look like a late '90s homeschooler. (COUGH COUGH! Not that I know ANYTHING about being homeschooled in the late '90s. COUGH COUGH!)

My Three Favorite Songs:

"La Mer"

"Mon Amie la Rose"

"Tous les Garcons et les Filles"

^Also this is one of my favorite music videos of all time. I used to watch it for hours on repeat when I was avoiding homework on Sunday afternoons.

And a random video of her singing "Le Premier Bonheur du Jour" and looking impossibly gorgeous.

Francoise Hardy is just awesome and practically perfect in every way. ;-D

-Millie

Photo of the Day!

Ring of Fire (1961): This Movie Is So Bloody Awesome That I Don't Even Have a Fake Alternate Post Title

 

Ring of Fire is a '60s film. It stars David Janssen. It has an epic theme song. It has sullen, punk gangster teenagers (led by Frank Gorshin...which is just weird). IT TAKES PLACE AND WAS FILMED IN WASHINGTON. GLORIOUS WASHINGTON.

If there was the presence of tofu and/or a cameo of Annette fake surfing -- I would know for certain this film was created specifically for me.

It was utterly perfect. (In fact it received 6/5 stars. ;-D)

A huge, huge thank you goes to Auntie Casey for taping and sending this film to me. THANKS AUNTIE CASEY!

{So, first of all, you need to go watch this movie. It is not available on DVD or VHS, but it IS going to be playing on TCM June 18th!}

I'm a big fan of Pacific Northwest cinema -- specifically centered in Glorious Washington (Oregon is not NEARLY as cool ;-D). This movie just made me happy.

It starts out and we find that a gas station in Tacoma has been robbed (Tacoma. MY TACOMA. The City of Destiny). The sullen, punk gangster teenagers who robbed the Tacoma gas station are now in Shelton -- where this film takes place (Shelton is about an hour or so south of my house...not far at all).

Every review, EVERY REVIEW -- whether by bloggers, on IMDb, or what -- has falsely stated that Ring of Fire takes place in Oregon (Oregonians are always trying to latch onto Washington's coolness. ;-D). A portion of the movie WAS filmed in Oregon: the town and burning sawmill (they needed a sawmill to burn and couldn't burn down the still-functioning Shelton mill). However, the film takes place IN Washington and the rest of the movie was filmed in Washington... and the cinematography is GORGEOUS.

There are lengthy sections that take place in the forest and its all so utterly wunderbar. Although, there are also lengthy sections that depict a forest fire...not wunderbar (I actually get really stressed out because I'm a tree dork...haha).

ANYWAY, I thoroughly enjoyed Ring of Fire. David Janssen was so utterly brilliant. He really had the least interesting character type: the noble sheriff. But, he made the character so interesting. The viewer sees a whole character, with an actual personality. And I was definitely wondering about his past (so many random mentions THAT WERE UNRESOLVED FOR ME. This is unacceptable -- even for Mind-Smushing Entertainment. ;-D).

 ^Beware! He's giving the classic Janssen stare...who knows what will happen next!

And although I've seen Joyce Taylor in random television shows, I had never seen her in such a large part before. SHE WAS AWESOME. She automatically made me think of a '60s Paulette Goddard (her voice especially was crazily similar).

 

And everyone else was cool and good and all that (everytime I see Frank Gorshin in ANYTHING, I automatically go, "Money! Money! Money!"). I just really liked the movie. The first hour was definitely the strongest. The last thirty minutes were taken up by the forest fire and became less about the story and characterizations. But, the forest fire stuff was definitely impressive.

Anyway. I'd totally recommend this movie. Because one, you have David Janssen playing a sheriff going after some fugitives (oh yes!). Two, you have great supporting acting. Three, you have the impressive effects. Four, YOU HAVE THAT COOL THEME SONG. Five, you have dialogue that is just deliciously '60s. And six, you have stunning cinematography of my homeland: Glorious Washington. Washington is always a good reason to watch a movie (except for a certain film series about a sparkly vampire and his underage girlfriend. THAT is where I draw the line. ;-D).

Sorry that this post makes no sense. My Washington adoration/David Janssen fan-girlism is hard to explain sometimes. haha

Oh, and if you'd like to be even MORE confused: watch a scene in French!

-Millie

Thanks again, Casey!